The Tangled Web of Familial Homophobia

A Secret Love (Directed by Chris Bolan, Netflix, 2020)

But I was not prepared for the central role in the documentary film played by Terry’s nieces, Diana Bolan and Tammy Donahue; nor was I prepared for their jarring, casual homophobia. A Secret Love begins with Terry and Pat coming out to their families after having been a couple (they told ...
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The Tangled Web of Familial Homophobia

Female Husbands

A Trans History

Female husband as a descriptive category lost its meaning in public discourse just as it proliferated in the U.S. from roughly 1878 to 1906. It had already largely fallen out of use in the U.K. Female husbands -- once defined by manhood and masculinity -- were quietly and subtly subsumed ...
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Female Husbands

Don’t Pop the Champagne Yet on “They”

Cultural milestones are powerful — but is language a substitute for equal rights?

In 2017, the popular tv show Billions introduced the nonbinary character Taylor Mason (played by Asia Kate Dillon) who used they/them pronouns in a significant recurring role. It features one of the most incisive scenes in television or film that captures the significance of nonbinary identity. Taylor says they don’t want to ...
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Don’t Pop the Champagne Yet on “They”

Committees Are for Straight People

LGBTQ people want equality now — here are three things you can do

Queer, trans, and gay people have long been refused work, denied advancement opportunities, and fired for reasons relating to their being out -- and sometimes too proud. Employment nondiscrimination protections matter but they do not address subtler forms of bias in hiring and promotion, such as whether LGBTQ people who ...
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The Performance of Transgender Inclusion

The pronoun go-round and the new gender binary

The first time someone asked me my pronoun was about a decade ago at a meeting of directors of LGBTQ centers from colleges and universities in the Northeast. Sitting around a table for our first session, we were invited to share our names, pronouns, and the school we represented. I ...
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Why Do You Call Us Ladies?

History, gender, and manners in public life

Consider the story of Abigail Adams and her most famous quote. When Abigail Adams asked her husband John to “Remember the Ladies” as he drafted the Declaration of Independence, she was not advocating for the rights of American women who were predominantly poor, indentured, and enslaved. Rather, she called specifically ...
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